#Undecided got the idea for our #25 on our list, and that’s
The Two Of Us Combined! I must admit I got really excited when I heard that
LOL.. I mean, I read somewhere *most likely in one of the blogs I followed*
that bloggers are the most narcissistic people, and well.. I guess that’s kinda
true for two of us LOL! What else is a major narcissistic’ favorite subject but
herself? And that applies for ONE narcissist, there are two of us! So major
love! *grin widely*
I believe friendship is a lot like relationship with your
significant other. You need to cherish it never taking it for granted, and
always nourishing it. Communication is also key. *we clearly have no problem
with communication since we BBM each other endlessly everyday*. One party
should care and make as much effort as the other because relationship (and
friendship) goes both ways, and that’s how it will lasts. Take it from us,
we’ve been BFFS for so many years already, and every year we are getting closer
and closer (to a point where one of us start to get sick and immediately BBM
the other to warn the other one of upcoming sickness, yes we’re like cosmic-ly
related somehow LOL). Also never to keep any resentment and anger to each other
*not annoyance, mild annoyances are very normal, it’s hardly a thing to fuss
about*, thank God we’re both very forward people and will tell each other if
there’s anything that is hurting us caused by the other one.
Getting to this point is not easy, we have been through hell and back. And it’s okay, because that’s how you find The One. LOL. Seriously I think I use to many relationship analogy, I hope you guys understand my intentions :p. There are two major incidents that stood out the most *because our friendship is pretty smooth actually, we don’t really bicker much. Any problems we encounter that I describe as hell and back came from other sources not from both of us* throughout our friendship, and no matter how sucky those two incidents are, I *and I hope #Undecided too* never regretted it and would’ve done exactly the same thing again. Because through faults and mistakes, we learn and grow. Otherwise we’d never turn into the awesome us *shameless again* today. Every major incidents in our lives defines and strengthen our friendship, and that is how I know, we’re both in it for life.
The first incident happened many many years ago, when we were starting 1st grade in high school *before I moved to Singapore* (like #Undecided said, I never forget. I might forgive, but to forget is an impossibility for me). Now, I must tell you that early teenage me *I was fourteen years old for goodness sake, forgive my stupidity* is a very far cry from me today. You who knows me in real life after my high school day (university friends, or after) would never recognize the early teenage me. I was super shy, self-conscious, not to mention had a very low self-esteem *I was probably at my heaviest, which was only matched when I was about 9 months pregnant ever since LOL. Told you I am not skinny but I am definitely not obese now hehe*. And teenagers are the cruelest creature in this world. I felt fat, ugly and didn’t belong. And I was surrounded by five confident and gorgeous girls (by then standard, I’d think you guys are super nerdy looking if I saw you guys back then now, HAHAHAHAHAHAH sorry sorry sorry girls!) only added to my shame on myself.
My mum always told me I was pretty, in my own way, thank you mummy, I love you. Only my mummy made me feel special back then *cry baby is in tears while typing this, i’m telling you this is not an easy story to tell*. And to add salt into injury, we *me, #Undecided, A, G, W and another girl C* was super into Backstreet Boys and Spice Girls and would love to imagine we’re Asian counterpart of Spice Girls *sorry, silly teenage girls, please understand* and we’d compose songs of our own *really* LOL and pretend to be a girl band. And somehow this made us very famous in our school *I’m not exaggerating, some of our then seniors are now acquaintances of us and they all know us, they’d describe us as “six snotty girls who always walk side by side-all six of them-with their chins up to the sky* ROFL. And by some silly reasons we made “surveys” on who’s the fave “member” *WTF*, and obviously nobody chose fugly me *I dare you fuckwits to say that to my face now, sorry suddenly angry remembering those mean people, I’m not saying it was cruel not to like me but it was extremely cruel to mock my appearances, n guess what I am 1000x better looking than YOU now, so go FYS. Sorry ah blog readers, I’m not talking to you I am just letting off some steam* and it crushes the shit out of fourteen-year-old-soft-hearted-timid me.
This time though our joint entry are written separately,
because as you know I am currently on a holiday in Bali *yayyy* and we wanted
to do this to celebrate New Year, so… This is the very first time I am writing
a joint entry not knowing what #Undecided’s rough writing plan is*LOL* so I
hope I’m not repeating stuffs she already mentioned in her part.
Anyway… you should know by now, #Undecided and I are pretty
awesome individuals *shameless*, and we’re cool on our owns, but us combined?
That’s another story altogether. Two of us together is what Barney from HIMYM
*yes, this is my current fave TV show* would say, “we are legen…. Wait for it…
dary”. LOL. When two of us are together there is never a dull moment. We never
got bored together, be it hanging out at malls or whatever, just lazing around
at home, anything would be fun for us. There are things we’d never do alone *or
with other people* but when we’re together we’d suddenly have an extra strength
to do it. Like #Undecided’s super power to get through her fear of Ghost Houses
when I dragged her to those *because I LOVEE them!*, well of course not without
a little force and plenty of trying-to-back-down moments, but she always pulled
through *grin* |
| Us in front of Ghost Ship, Of course Baby Boy didn't enter the Ghost Ship, he's just posing with us HAHA |
Getting to this point is not easy, we have been through hell and back. And it’s okay, because that’s how you find The One. LOL. Seriously I think I use to many relationship analogy, I hope you guys understand my intentions :p. There are two major incidents that stood out the most *because our friendship is pretty smooth actually, we don’t really bicker much. Any problems we encounter that I describe as hell and back came from other sources not from both of us* throughout our friendship, and no matter how sucky those two incidents are, I *and I hope #Undecided too* never regretted it and would’ve done exactly the same thing again. Because through faults and mistakes, we learn and grow. Otherwise we’d never turn into the awesome us *shameless again* today. Every major incidents in our lives defines and strengthen our friendship, and that is how I know, we’re both in it for life.
The first incident happened many many years ago, when we were starting 1st grade in high school *before I moved to Singapore* (like #Undecided said, I never forget. I might forgive, but to forget is an impossibility for me). Now, I must tell you that early teenage me *I was fourteen years old for goodness sake, forgive my stupidity* is a very far cry from me today. You who knows me in real life after my high school day (university friends, or after) would never recognize the early teenage me. I was super shy, self-conscious, not to mention had a very low self-esteem *I was probably at my heaviest, which was only matched when I was about 9 months pregnant ever since LOL. Told you I am not skinny but I am definitely not obese now hehe*. And teenagers are the cruelest creature in this world. I felt fat, ugly and didn’t belong. And I was surrounded by five confident and gorgeous girls (by then standard, I’d think you guys are super nerdy looking if I saw you guys back then now, HAHAHAHAHAHAH sorry sorry sorry girls!) only added to my shame on myself.
My mum always told me I was pretty, in my own way, thank you mummy, I love you. Only my mummy made me feel special back then *cry baby is in tears while typing this, i’m telling you this is not an easy story to tell*. And to add salt into injury, we *me, #Undecided, A, G, W and another girl C* was super into Backstreet Boys and Spice Girls and would love to imagine we’re Asian counterpart of Spice Girls *sorry, silly teenage girls, please understand* and we’d compose songs of our own *really* LOL and pretend to be a girl band. And somehow this made us very famous in our school *I’m not exaggerating, some of our then seniors are now acquaintances of us and they all know us, they’d describe us as “six snotty girls who always walk side by side-all six of them-with their chins up to the sky* ROFL. And by some silly reasons we made “surveys” on who’s the fave “member” *WTF*, and obviously nobody chose fugly me *I dare you fuckwits to say that to my face now, sorry suddenly angry remembering those mean people, I’m not saying it was cruel not to like me but it was extremely cruel to mock my appearances, n guess what I am 1000x better looking than YOU now, so go FYS. Sorry ah blog readers, I’m not talking to you I am just letting off some steam* and it crushes the shit out of fourteen-year-old-soft-hearted-timid me.
And then I began making up stories. I made up stories about
guys admirers *which trust me, by the next year I do not need to invent because
they all crawled at my door, I should’ve been more patient. i even got called "slut" in my later high school life because i casually dated different guys evey day LOL* who never existed
and brag about it *again, please understand, I was really young back then, I am
NOT a liar. This is why I am elaborating this story now, and I’ve never create
any story up ever since because I know I don’t need to*, I just wanted to fit
in. I was in a very popular group yet I was always the outcast.
One day *I think they made an investigation or something,
LOL* they suddenly all confronted me. One or two person more prominent from the
others *I remember G never said a word during that time and that’s when I
realized I loved her haha*, they sat me down and judge me. Really judge me like
in a court room. I am shaking with anger at this right now LOL, because really,
what made them thought they had any right to do so? Telling me gently one on
one was the right way to go *guess what, this happened to me twice but the
second one was so stupid, and with non significant people, so eff them haha*.
This is why I am dead set against bullying, because one way or another, this
WAS bullying (despite of whether I caused this to myself or not they should've dealt with it in a more humane approach).
They shamed me and made me believe I was the most rotten
person on earth *from a 14 years old perspective* and thought none of them will
ever be my friends again. I don’t remember if it was G or #Undecided who first
approached me. It was not more than a few days after, probably only one LOL.
They told me they missed me and doesn’t care about what I did, it was stupid
but that was just that. A stupidity, hardly a crime. And for me, that was the
defining moment. This is why I love them the most *hugs*. Because no matter
what the “leader” of the group said, they didn’t care. They cared about ME
more. And they were silly 14 year old girls too as well, so this spoke a LOT of
their strong personalities. I would never approach them first, my pride *which
is HUGE* would never let me. If none of them went to me I can safely say we
would not be friends now.
The second accident was more recent. Probably six, seven
years ago? I was not married yet so it should be around that time frame. My
then boyfriend *now hubby, LOL*, introduced her to his old school friend *and
we do hold grudges against him up until now for introducing such a horrible
fugly monster to her* and they began dating. They didn’t date long, three
months or so *I cannot remember*, but she was a very different person during
those time. She is a shadow, a ghost of her own vibrant, confident, sure self.
She became withdrawn, stopped joking, start dressing like a fugly librarian
*and her real style is sexy-casual, go figure* and eventually start finding
excuses not to hang out with us.
I got really upset with her *back then my partner in crime
was A, I bitch about #Undecided a LOT to A, because I missed her so much, I
needed an outlet to vent and A was a ready one, we both hated MF *Short of
M*ther F*cker* with vengeance. We could see what a controlling, hateful person
MF was *even though they were having a long distant relationship! That’s how
strong he got a hold of her back then* and my hatred towards him I totally channel
to #Undecided. I felt like she was throwing us, her BFFS, away for him and I
couldn’t understand why, I could see he was treating her badly.
I began ignoring and avoiding her, because I hated her so
much I didn’t want to have an episode of outbursts. One final straw is when we
went to watch Kung Fu Panda together with A and G as well. I completely ignored
#Undecided and pretend she didn’t exist. A told me later than she was in tears
when confiding in A, she was confused why I was acting that way to her. And she
added “MF though #Pink is very childish and immature”. And when I heard that I
EXPLODED. I was super MAD and immediately texted her *BBM was still a far dream
back then*, telling her everything I had held deep inside my heart. I told her
I hated her, I hated MF, I hated the person MF is turning her to be and how
disappointed I was in her for chucking me, her BFF for so many years, for
someone she knew a few month. I remember she said something along the line “I
thought you were my friend” and me telling her “by this rate you will have NO
friends!” and said “so you don’t want to be friends with me anymore?” and I
said “probably not”. LOL. It was the most cruel I’ve ever been to her.
But guess what, I was right. MF was NOT treating her good.
He was always belittling and putting her down. ALWAYS. Telling her she is not
good enough in everything she did. He always find faults in her *seriously MF,
what the f*ck? You’re so effing ugly you dared say that to my BFF? If I meet
you now I will punch you in the face”. Everything she said or do was never
enough, it was always wrong. She laughs too hard, she put to much junk on her
face, she wears disgustingly slutty clothings, etc etc. I was MAD at MF for
being such a dickhead and mad at #Undecided to let such a low life to rule her
life like that.
And I was super proud when she walked out from that
unhealthy relationship. PROUD. She is still the person I’ve always knew after
all. A strong, independent woman. I told her to find that person who would love
her and accept her, flaws and all. I love the quote “I love you not despite of
you flaws, but in spite of them” and I swear by this quote. NEVER settle for
anything less than that. NEVER. And she should be grateful for me interfering
or else she wouldn’t have met her hubby now. LOL.
I was dead serious when I typed “i don’t think I want to be
your friend anymore” and #Undecided saved this friendship by replying “Are you
sure? Is there no way to make this work? Because I do not want us to stop being
friends”. And ever since, we’re like in a whole another level of closeness
*please leave any pervertic thoughts out the door, ew ew ew*. I actually just
realized that both time I was the one who was ready to walk out?? WTF. Okay
lah, remember this #Undecided, I sang about you to heaven and back, you owe me,
not one!!! You owe me ten!
And that was probably the only huge arguments we had,
really. We never have any issues ever again. But those two fights made a mark,
especially for me. I then knew that we’re meant to be friends forever. We’re
both huge fans of Ghost Whisperer *Jennifer Love Hewitt! Love that girl!* and
we’re always crazy about the “white light” *the one you’re supposed to see when
you die so you can cross over to the other side? We made a pact to walk to the white
light together, hand in hand *LOL*.
So that’s my #25! My fave thing , me and my BFF, #Pink and
#Undecided, together there is nothing impossible for us! I really do hope
nothing will ever change, #Undecided! Happy New Year and wish we will celebrate
MANY MANY MANY more new years, preferably together! LOVE you!
It's us against the world, Baby!
- 4:09:00 PM
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